PlanetEnjoy.com

A young man went to his father one day to tell him that he wanted to get married.

His father was happy for him. He asked his son who the girl was, and he told him that it was Samantha a girl from the neighborhood.

With a sad face the old man said to his son, ‘I’m sorry to say this son but I have to.

The girl you want to marry is your sister, but please don’t tell your mother.’

The young man again brought 3 more names to his father but ended up frustrated cause the response was still the same.

There was once a Gujarati Bhai Patel, owning a shop, living in USA,

and he was involved in a car accident.

At the hospital, when he awoke,

he called for the nurse to find out what had happened to him.

I’m very sorry, sir, but you were involved in a very bad car crash.

“Car crash! My Corolla!! Is my car all right?” he asked hysterically.

“Sir, your car was destroyed, but that is the least of your worries - you lost your left arm in the crash, and we were unable to save it,”

santa singh ji class mein - madam meine abc yaad karli..

madam -ok , to sunao

santa singh - abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz…..

madam - arey aise nahi ….aise suna A for apple

santa singh - ok madam…. A for apple.

B for bada apple.

C for chhota apple.

D for dusra apple.

E for ek aur apple.

F for fokat ka apple.

G for gol apple.

H for hazar apple

I for itney saarey apple?

J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple

K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple

Andhe ke hath me “TORCH”,
Bahare ke hath me “RADIO”,
Gunge ke hath me “MIKE”,
AUR AAP KE HATH ME ” MOBILE ”
WAH WAH Kya Jamana Aaya hai!!!
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Evolution of Man:
Shadi se pahale: HERO No. 1
Shadi ke baad: COOLIE No. 1
Shadi se pahale: Meine Pyar Kiya
Shadi ke bad: Yeh Meine kya kiya
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Teri yaad mein humne kalam uthaayi
liya paper aur tasveer aapki bnayi
socha tha ki usko dil se laga kar rakhenge
magar vo to bacho ko draane ke kaam aayi…
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Fool
Earth may stop Rotating, Birds may stop Flying, Candles may stop Melting,
Fishes may stop Swimming, Heart may stop Beating, But your Brain will never start working!

Lunatic
I’ve written nice poem 4 you. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star..
you should Know What you R..& Once you Know What you R.. Mental Hospital is not So Far..

Dead Fool
Why are Egyptian’s Children always confused??
Coz after death, their DADDY becomes the MUMMY.

Mental
My friend, the best quality that I like about u is that, U R very sentimental ….
10% Senti and 90% Mental..!

When u feel lonely and alone & cannot see any one around you, the world seems to be fading away,come along with me i’ll take u to an eye specialist!!

If marriages are made in heaven , then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage

During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom made to sit on the horse ?
Ans : He is given his last chance to run away.

Just close ur eyes and think of urself for 10 seconds…… Open ur eyes !
Now you will realize that u have wasted 10 sec in thinking of a fool….

Your wife’s rating to your Actions

How to take care of your wife:

In the world, one single rule applies to the men: Make the Woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that’s the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

Driver mar gaya kya?

Ek baar ek Totaa (Bole to Parrot ) Ud Raha tha full speed par ….

Uske Saamne full speed me ek Ferrari AA rahi thi …

Dono ki takkar hui …

Totaa Behosh …

Raste me Ek Beggar tha

Usne Tote ko uthaya aur Ghar Le gaya …

Usko Marham lagaya ..

Aur Pinjare me rakh diya …

Jab Tote ko hosh aaya …

Usne apne aap ko Pinjare me dekha …
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A couple, hosting a dinner party, were interrupted when the maid called the hostess to the kitchen.

“Ma’am, the cat climbed up on the kitchen counter and ate the middle of the salmon.”

Light on her feet, the hostess told her to replace the missing portion with canned salmon, then returned to her guests. As everyone enjoyed the fish, the maid summoned the hostess into the kitchen again.

“Ma’am, the cat is dead!”

The frightened hostess felt obliged to inform her guests and suggested everyone go to the hospital together to get their stomachs pumped.

You can be sure someone is an ****** when he/she:

Spends twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said concentrate.

Puts lipstick on their forhead because he wanted to makeup his mind.

Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.

Sends a fax with a stamp on it.

Was on the corner giving out potato chips yellin’ “Free Lays!”

Tries to drown a fish.

If you gave them a penny for their intelligence, you’d get change.

Thinks socialism means partying.

Trips over a cordless phone.

Takes a ruler to bed to see how long they slept.