Archive for Jokes

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR BOSS

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR BOSS

1 When you take a long time, you’re slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough.
2 When you don’t do it, you’re lazy.
When your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy.
3 When you make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he’s only human.
4 When doing something without being told, you’re overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that’s initiative.
5 When you take a stand, you’re being pig-headed.
When your boss does it, he’s being firm.
6 When you overlooked a rule of ettiquette, you’re being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he’s being original.
7 When you please your boss, you’re arse-creeping.
When your boss pleases his boss, he’s being co-operative.
8 When you’re out of the office, you’re wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he’s on business.
9 When you’re on a day off sick, you’re always sick.
When your boss has a day off sick, he must be very ill.
10

Sardar Jokes : Some of the Humorous Sardar Jokes

Sardar Jokes : Some of the Humorous Sardar Jokes

Brilliant Sardarji !!!

A Sardar and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asks if he would like to play a fun-game.

The Sardar, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.

He says, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5, and vice versa.”

Brave wife visiting the dentist

Joke: Brave wife visiting the dentist

A man and his wife entered a dentist’s office.

The wife said, “I want a tooth pulled. I don’t want gas or Novocain because I’m in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.”

“You’re a brave woman,” said the dentist. “Now, show me which tooth it is.”

The wife turns to her husband and says: “Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear.

Surd does it again

A Sardar, recently arrived in the US, wanting to earn some money,
decides to become a ‘handy-man’ and starts looking for some work in an
upmarket colony nearby.

He goes to the front door of the nearest house and asks the owner, another Indian, if he had any odd jobs for him to do.

“Well, you can paint my porch,” the owner says.

The Sardar responds, “How about $50?”

The owner says “Fine – there’s a can of brown paint and brushes in the garage.”

Three sardarjes in a Singapore – Funney Jokes

three sardarjes in a Singapore

three sardar jees went for a tour to Singapore
they searched for rooms everywhere and finally got one which is in the topmost
floor of a 100 floor hotel
after taking rest they started for a local vist

while leaving the hotel, the manager informed them that they should reach the hotel before 10. 00 pm or else lift will not be available and they have to take the
steps for which they agreed and went out

Veterinary Doctor … are you an engineer ?

Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said : Doctor I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period.

Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.

Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only

Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.

Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only…

Good Hindi Jokes – Read n Enjoy

निरीक्षण

पुलिस में सिपाहियों की भर्ती के लिये साक्षात्कार के दौरान अभ्यार्थियों को एक व्यक्ति की तस्वीर दिखाते हुये साक्षात्कारकर्ता ने कहा – ”एक पुलिसवाले में निरीक्षण करने की शक्ति का होना बहुत आवश्यक है। इस चित्रको ध्यान से देखो और बताओ कि इसमें तुम्हें क्या खास बात दिखाई देती है ?”
पहले आवेदक ने कहा – ”इस आदमी के सिर्फ एक कान है ?”
”तुम जा सकते हो” – साक्षात्कारकर्ता ने असंतुष्टि का भाव प्रदर्शित करते कहा।
दूसरा आवेदक आया और बोला – ”यह एक कान वाला आदमी है।”
”बाहर निकल जाओ” – साक्षात्कारकर्ता चिल्लाया।

Fine for Full Year

जुर्माना

कॉलेज के पहले दिन, प्राचार्य महोदय ने छात्रों को कॉलेज के नियम समझाये – ”कोई भी लड़का लड़कियों के हॉस्टल में नहीं जा सकेगा। इसी प्रकार कोई भी लड़की लड़कों के हॉस्टल में नहीं जा सकती। इस नियम उल्लंघन करने पर पहली बार 100 रूपये जुर्माना भरना पड़ेगा। दूसरी बार पकड़े जाने पर 200 रूपये जुर्माना भरना पड़ेगा। इसी प्रकार यदि तीसरी बार पकड़े गये तो 1000 रूपये जुर्माना अदा करना होगा। किसी को इस बारे में कुछ पूछना है ? एक लड़के ने हाथ उठाया और पूछा , ”पूरे एक सत्र के लिये क्या देना होगा सर ?”

Asking Salary Increase ???

One day an employee sends a letter to Her boss asking for an increase in her salary!!!

Dear Bo$$ In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$$incerely,
Norman $hah

The next day, the employee recieved this letter of reply:

PJ’s

*PJ’s*
a)A gorgeous girl walks up 2 a a professor’s cabin and says I will do anything 2 pass in the exam. Professor: anything! Girl: ya Prof: open your books and study

b) 2 Lovers plan to suicide. Boy jumped first, Girl closed her eyes & return back saying love is blind. Boy in air opened his parachute saying love never dies.

c)Father 2 son. padosi ki ladki ko dekh. woh exam main 1st aai hai. Son: us ko he to dekhta tha tabhe to fail hogaya.