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A Sardar, recently arrived in the US, wanting to earn some money,
decides to become a ‘handy-man’ and starts looking for some work in an
upmarket colony nearby.

He goes to the front door of the nearest house and asks the owner, another Indian, if he had any odd jobs for him to do.

“Well, you can paint my porch,” the owner says.

The Sardar responds, “How about $50?”

The owner says “Fine - there’s a can of brown paint and brushes in the garage.”

three sardarjes in a Singapore

three sardar jees went for a tour to Singapore
they searched for rooms everywhere and finally got one which is in the topmost
floor of a 100 floor hotel
after taking rest they started for a local vist

while leaving the hotel, the manager informed them that they should reach the hotel before 10. 00 pm or else lift will not be available and they have to take the
steps for which they agreed and went out

Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said : Doctor I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period.

Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.

Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only

Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.

Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only…

निरीक्षण

पुलिस में सिपाहियों की भर्ती के लिये साक्षात्कार के दौरान अभ्यार्थियों को एक व्यक्ति की तस्वीर दिखाते हुये साक्षात्कारकर्ता ने कहा - ”एक पुलिसवाले में निरीक्षण करने की शक्ति का होना बहुत आवश्यक है। इस चित्रको ध्यान से देखो और बताओ कि इसमें तुम्हें क्या खास बात दिखाई देती है ?”
पहले आवेदक ने कहा - ”इस आदमी के सिर्फ एक कान है ?”
”तुम जा सकते हो” - साक्षात्कारकर्ता ने असंतुष्टि का भाव प्रदर्शित करते कहा।
दूसरा आवेदक आया और बोला - ”यह एक कान वाला आदमी है।”
”बाहर निकल जाओ” - साक्षात्कारकर्ता चिल्लाया।

जुर्माना

कॉलेज के पहले दिन, प्राचार्य महोदय ने छात्रों को कॉलेज के नियम समझाये - ”कोई भी लड़का लड़कियों के हॉस्टल में नहीं जा सकेगा। इसी प्रकार कोई भी लड़की लड़कों के हॉस्टल में नहीं जा सकती। इस नियम उल्लंघन करने पर पहली बार 100 रूपये जुर्माना भरना पड़ेगा। दूसरी बार पकड़े जाने पर 200 रूपये जुर्माना भरना पड़ेगा। इसी प्रकार यदि तीसरी बार पकड़े गये तो 1000 रूपये जुर्माना अदा करना होगा। किसी को इस बारे में कुछ पूछना है ? एक लड़के ने हाथ उठाया और पूछा , ”पूरे एक सत्र के लिये क्या देना होगा सर ?”

One day an employee sends a letter to Her boss asking for an increase in her salary!!!

Dear Bo$$ In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.

Your$$incerely,
Norman $hah

The next day, the employee recieved this letter of reply:

*PJ’s*
a)A gorgeous girl walks up 2 a a professor’s cabin and says I will do anything 2 pass in the exam. Professor: anything! Girl: ya Prof: open your books and study

b) 2 Lovers plan to suicide. Boy jumped first, Girl closed her eyes & return back saying love is blind. Boy in air opened his parachute saying love never dies.

c)Father 2 son. padosi ki ladki ko dekh. woh exam main 1st aai hai. Son: us ko he to dekhta tha tabhe to fail hogaya.

A young man went to his father one day to tell him that he wanted to get married.

His father was happy for him. He asked his son who the girl was, and he told him that it was Samantha a girl from the neighborhood.

With a sad face the old man said to his son, ‘I’m sorry to say this son but I have to.

The girl you want to marry is your sister, but please don’t tell your mother.’

The young man again brought 3 more names to his father but ended up frustrated cause the response was still the same.

There was once a Gujarati Bhai Patel, owning a shop, living in USA,

and he was involved in a car accident.

At the hospital, when he awoke,

he called for the nurse to find out what had happened to him.

I’m very sorry, sir, but you were involved in a very bad car crash.

“Car crash! My Corolla!! Is my car all right?” he asked hysterically.

“Sir, your car was destroyed, but that is the least of your worries - you lost your left arm in the crash, and we were unable to save it,”

santa singh ji class mein - madam meine abc yaad karli..

madam -ok , to sunao

santa singh - abcdefghijklemnopqrstuvwxyz…..

madam - arey aise nahi ….aise suna A for apple

santa singh - ok madam…. A for apple.

B for bada apple.

C for chhota apple.

D for dusra apple.

E for ek aur apple.

F for fokat ka apple.

G for gol apple.

H for hazar apple

I for itney saarey apple?

J for jaao nahi khaani hai apple

K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple